Numbers Crunching II: Movin' On Up

Adventures with Johnny, Part 30

Johnny makes her way to the Capitol Building, where she plans to "talk to" House Democrats and get them to work out this bail-out bill.

Then, she's going to make her way John Boehner's office and leave a "present" for him.

Adventures with Johnny, Part 29

Johnny helps Senator Joe Biden prep for his VP debate with Sarah Palin this Thursday.

I Laugh, So That I May Not Cry

Numbers Crunching

There's an extraordinary website called 538, which follows every single kind of poll imaginable related to the presidential race, and tries to arrive at an accurate snapshot of where the electorate is right now.

The guy that runs it, Nate Silver, made his bones during the primaries, predicting the outcomes of the races more accurately than almost anyone else. And while it's pretty clear he's an Obama supporter, he's not been afraid to say when and where McCain has made ground, or like in the early part of September, shot past Obama.

Anyway, the above pie graph is always on the front page of the site, on the top left, and it gives you an accurate shot of where things stand at the moment.

Tracy and I check and re-check those numbers several times a day, and when one of us detects a change, we yell it out excitedly. I know we're not the only ones on tenterhooks, because within a few minutes of a new post Nate puts up, there's about a hundred comments already posted.

Anyway, after a grim early September, Obama is rallying back, and as you can see from above, he's got a substantial lead electorally.

But as I've said to Trace many times, I want it to look more like this:

...I won't be happy until that damn pie graph looks like Pac-Man!

"Zero"

R.I.P. Paul Newman 1925-2008

An extraordinary actor, an extraordinary man.

Adventures with Johnny, Part 28

Johnny hustles herself off stage as Senators McCain and Obama come out for the debate in Mississippi.

Wow! McCain Wins Debate--Seven Hours Early!

Wow! Not only is John McCain a Mavericky Maverick, he has the ability to travel through time.

Lyrics by ZZ Top

I'm shufflin' thru the Texas sand
But my head's in Mississippi
I'm shufflin' thru the Texas sand
But my head's in Mississippi
The blues has got a hold of me
I believe I'm gettin' dizzy

I keep thinkin' 'bout that night in Memphis
Lord, I thought I was in Heaven
I keep thinkin' 'bout that night in Memphis
I thought I was in Heaven
But I was stumblin' thru the parking lot
Of an invisible seven eleven

Last night I saw a cowgirl
She was floatin' across the ceiling
And last night I saw a naked cowgirl
She was floatin' across the ceiling
She was mumblin to some howlin' wolf
About some voodoo healin'

Where's my head baby?
Somewhere in Mississippi

Adventures with Johnny, Part 27

Johnny helps Obama prep for tomorrow night's debate. She lightens the mood and makes Obama laugh by telling him a joke about McCain.

Dear Sen. McCain--Johnny can make it to the debate, and she's only three.

Nov. 4 Scorecard

As I have said before, I'm figuring this Nov. 4 election could be the single most exciting, fulfilling one of my life--in perpetuity.

Growing up as I did under Reagan and Bush, I always looked at this country as a Republican one--the era when Democrats could run the country for almost twenty years straight (1933-1952) seemed as distant as the red planet Mars.

But now, events are lining up in such a way--thanks to the bottomless incompetence and downright evil of George W. Bush and Dick Cheney--that this Nov. 4 could hand progressives/liberals (whatever the hell you want to call us) the greatest set of long-lasting, game-changing victories I'll ever see.

So above is what I'd like to see, in order of importance. I'd love for the country to hand the reigns of power over to the Dems so massively that Republicans equate "George W. Bush" with Utter Failure.

But, of course, the order of importance changes if #1 happens--if Obama wins the White House, I don't care as much about massive majorities in the House and Senate, because its not like they'll worry about Obama vetoing their bills (and if he does, I'd bet I'd side with Obama over most of the House Dems anyway--Pelosi? Reed? Hoyer? ugh)

So, in "Choose Your Own Adventure" style, here's how the scorecard changes if #1 happens:

...I want to see the Christianist bigots lose the Gay Marriage argument, and I want to see Al Franken win over Norm Coleman.

Sure, Al's a loudmouth and a smart ass, but he's a policy wonk--he knows his stuff. We need people like that in the Senate after the morons the Republicans put in over the last eight years.

So we'll post this again on Nov.5 and see how we did!

Some Famous 9/24s

Is today worse than these? John McCain thinks so:

September 24, 1864: The nation is literally at risk of collapse, mengaged in a large-scale civil war: "Yet the campaign for the presidency was "now being prosecuted with the utmost vigor," as one could read in the New York Times."

September 24, 1932: The nation is mired in Depression, coping with it a full time job, "Yet Herbert Hoover prepared to give a large speech in Iowa and Franklin Roosevelt had just given what became a famous address to the Commonwealth Club of San Francisco."

September 24, 1944: World War II well under way, with the United States engaged in fierce fighting, "Yet President Roosevelt had just officially launched his campaign for a fourth term, while Thomas Dewey took his turn speaking in San Francisco, challenging Roosevelt’s supremacy."

In The Balcony

A few months ago, a website all about old-time movies, In The Balcony, took some of my faux-movie serial posters and put them up on the site, completely independent of me.

I was really touched, and since I've become friends with some of the guys who are regulars there. The head ITB guy, Cliff, has promoted my work to all kinds of DVD companies (who he does work for), so much so that I've told him he's been a better agent for me than my real agent ever was.

Well, after Monday's update of namtab.com, Cliff did it again, which you can see here. As usual, I'm thrilled and flattered to get this kind of attention for my work, especially for stuff that I really enjoy doing--the vintage-style movie posters and paperback book covers.

Thanks Cliff!

Walking, Chewing Gum

So now McCain wants to halt his campaign? I wonder why, when he's never been shy about letting this campaign keep him from his day job:

Of all Senators, John McCain has been the most absent. There have been 643 votes taken in the current Senate session: McCain has missed 412 of them. McCain has not voted in the Senate since April 8th. Since March, he has missed 109 of the last 110 votes.

He missed votes on the GI Bill, energy policy, and in 2007 he missed "all 15 critical environmental votes in the Senate" --giving him a 2007 rating of 0% from the League of Conservation Voters."

Breaking News

Karl Rove attempts to be honest!:

A Toronto businessman asked him if he thought Sarah Palin would make a good President.

"I don't know," said Rove.

...Nice try, Karl, don't be afraid to give this "truth" thing another shot!

Ouch

When Great Minds Meet

"Aren't you a war criminal?"

"Aren't you a lying moron?"

Adventures with Johnny, Part 26

Johnny is at home, resting from all the globe-hopping she's been doing. She's going to be at the first debate this Friday, and she needs to be fresh.

Sleep tight, angel.

Adventures with Johnny, Part 25

We just got these photos developed--here's Johnny when she attended the Anti-Sarah Palin Rally in Alaska, held a week or two ago.

Johnny, being half-eskimo, feels a particular connection with those who hail from the frozen tundra. (Kindred spirits, and all that)

Here she is siding with the polar bears that Palin seems to hate so much:

Here's what the woman whose idea this rally was had to say about it:

"The Alaska Women Reject Palin rally was to be held outside on the lawn in front of the Loussac Library in midtown Anchorage. Home made signs were encouraged, and the idea was to make a statement that Sarah Palin does not speak for all Alaska women, or men. I had no idea what to expect.

The rally was organized by a small group of women, talking over coffee. It made me wonder what other things have started with small groups of women talking over coffee. It's probably an impressive list. These women hatched the plan, printed up flyers, posted them around town, and sent notices to local media outlets.

One of those media outlets was KBYR radio, home of Eddie Burke, a long-time uber-conservative Anchorage talk show host. Turns out that Eddie Burke not only announced the rally, but called the people who planned to attend the rally "a bunch of socialist baby-killing maggots," and read the home phone numbers of the organizers aloud over the air, urging listeners to call and tell them what they thought. The women, of course, received some nasty, harassing and threatening messages.

I felt a bit apprehensive. I'd been disappointed before by the turnout at other rallies. Basically, in Anchorage, if you can get 25 people to show up at an event, it's a success. So, I thought to myself, if we can actually get 100 people there that aren't sent by Eddie Burke, we'll be doing good. A real statement will have been made. I confess, I still had a mental image of 15 demonstrators surrounded by hundreds of menacing "socialist baby-killing maggot" haters.

It's a good thing I wasn't tailgating when I saw the crowd in front of the library or I would have ended up in somebody's trunk. When I got there, about 20 minutes early, the line of sign wavers stretched the full length of the library grounds, along the edge of the road, 6 or 7 people deep! I could hardly find a place to park. I nabbed one of the last spots in the library lot, and as I got out of the car and started walking, people seemed to join in from every direction, carrying signs.

Never, have I seen anything like it in my 17 and a half years living in Anchorage. The organizers had someone walk the rally with a counter, and they clicked off well over 1400 people (not including the 90 counter-demonstrators). This was the biggest political rally ever, in the history of the state. I was absolutely stunned. The second most amazing thing is how many people honked and gave the thumbs up as they drove by. And even those that didn't honk looked wide-eyed and awe-struck at the huge crowd that was growing by the minute. This just doesn't happen here.

Then, the infamous Eddie Burke showed up. He tried to talk to the media, and was instantly surrounded by a group of 20 people who started shouting O-BA-MA so loud he couldn't be heard. Then passing cars started honking in a rhythmic pattern of 3, like the Obama chant, while the crowd cheered, hooted and waved their signs high.

So, if you've been doing the math Yes. The Alaska Women Reject Palin rally was significantly bigger than Palin's rally that got all the national media coverage! So take heart, sit back, and enjoy the photo gallery. Feel free to spread the pictures around to anyone who needs to know that Sarah Palin most definitely does not speak for all Alaskans. The citizens of Alaska, who know her best, have things to say."

Adventures with Johnny, Part 24

Johnny participates in a commercial for the "No To Prop 8" movement. Prop 8 will be on the California ballot this November, asking people to overturn the California Supreme Court's ruling allowing same-sex marriages.

If Prop 8 passes, all the marriages conducted since May 16 would be retroactively ruled invalid and no new ones could be conducted after. That's crazy hata talk, and Johnny won't stand for it.

Click here to see the full video about the movement to say No On Prop 8.

Hammer, Hammer, Hammer...

This Obama guy ain't no Dukakis, Gore, or Kerry...

John McCain, Brilliant Tactician

"Opening up the health insurance market to more vigorous nationwide competition, as we have done over the last decade in banking, would provide more choices of innovative products less burdened by the worst excesses of state-based regulation."

-- John McCain, September 2007

Adventures with Johnny, Part 23

Johnny attends a meeting with Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson, Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke, and assorted government officials to discuss the AIG bail-out and other financial matters.

She suggests replacing them all with Pet Smarts.

Adventures with Johnny, Part 22

As Evelyn Forrester de Rothschild Von Pissypants goes on her American tour babbling on about how she's switched her support from Hillary Clinton to John McCain, Johnny is spotted "visiting" her estate in London.

Johnny will be peeing on her Persian rugs, scratching her French doors, burying her Cartier jewlery, and chewing up her Hermes scarfs.

That's my little girl.

Fun With Numbers

What's your Obama tax cut? Let's find out!

What's your family's filing status? (elderly: head of household at least 65 years old)	Single Married, One-Earner Married, Two-Earner Elderly, Single Elderly, Married
How many dependent children are in your family?	0 1 2 3-5 6+
What's closest to your Adjusted Gross Income?	$10,000 $15,000 $25,000 $35,000 $50,000 $75,000 $100,000 $125,000 $150,000 $200,000 $500,000+
Data courtesy of http://ObamaTaxCut.com/

Let's Help John McCain Find Spain

How would McCain's people react if Obama made this mistake?

Nice

I'm not going to Photoshop Johnny into this, I don't want to look like I'm goofing on this in any way.

It's a nice photo, that's all.

If--when--Obama becomes President, the kid will have this photo on his wall the rest of his life.

Adventures with Johnny, Part 21

Johnny grills Carly "Oops, I Did It Again" Fiorina on MSNBC, where she admitted that neither Sarah Palin or John McCain have the qualifications to run a Fortune 500 company.

Ms. Fiorina said it was just Palin who wasn't qualified to do so on the radio the day earlier, but she doubled-down on this off message talking point on MSNBC. Hence her removal from McCain's campaign about five minutes later.


As a side note: I think Fiorina's comment reveals the deepest, darkest, mostly-fervently held belief of the Republican Party. Forget abortion, forget foreign policy, forget gay marriage--the Republican's #1 belief is that Big Business is much, much more important than Government.

Let f**k-ups like Palin or McCain work in government--who cares? But don't let 'em near Big Business!

Adventures with Johnny, Part 20

Today is Johnny's 3rd birthday, and she graciously decided to come home for the day to spend some time with us, instead of galavanting out on the campaign trail.

We bought her a set of Weave Polls (her favorite part of Agility Class), but I think we could've saved our money and just bought her a 6-pack of socks, she seems so interested in them (see above).

Happy Birthday to our little girl!

To Quote Die Hard's John McClane:

"...Yippee-kay-yay, motherf**kers."

John McCain Does Al Gore One Better...

...McCain invented the Blackberry!:

Asked what work John McCain did as Chairman of the Senate Commerce Committee that helped him understand the financial markets, the candidate's top economic adviser wielded visual evidence: his BlackBerry.

"He did this," Douglas Holtz-Eakin told reporters this morning, holding up his BlackBerry. "Telecommunications of the United States is a premier innovation in the past 15 years, comes right through the Commerce committee so you're looking at the miracle John McCain helped create and that's what he did."

Wow.

Cast your minds back to 2000, when Al Gore's true statement about how his legislative support of new technologies helped bring about the internets was warped into a meme that he was an unrepentant liar, taking credit for things that weren't deserved.

Gore was mocked, repeatedly, for this, and it was definitely one of the reasons he lost.

Vote Obama '08.

Fun With Charts

What's knowledge and accuracy when you've got unstinting confidence?

Adventures with Johnny, Part 19

Here's Johnny as she prances around the Jacksonville Veterans Memorial Arena, where John McCain was making an appearance.

The arena seats 16,000, but only 3,000 people showed up, hence the rows and rows empty seas--lots of room for Johnny to play!

Adventures with Johnny, Part 18

Johnny prepares to board an Alaska Airlines jet, on her way to the 49th state to do some research on Sarah Palin.

(She is currently working on a piece for Crazy Lying Fundamentalist Know-Nothing Power Mad Bully magazine.)

The $66 Million Dollar Man

Obama shatters his fundraising record, raising $66 million in August.

2 Years of Random Goofiness

Today is the 2nd anniversary of this blog, my first.

I had no idea when I absentmindedly started this one up that blogging would soon become a downright addiction, to the point where I now have about ten other blogs, all in various states (some completed, some ongoing, some still to come), and that it would become so important to me.

Oddly, this blog--which I go out of my way not to promote--has more of an audience than it has ever had. I know that I told my friends and family about it, but every day I look at Google Analytics and I see there's a bunch of people who are reading this whom I don't know.

In any case, I thank you for your interest, and your patience with my sometimes angry, sometimes incoherent ramblings.

I plan to have a Twinkie today in celebration. I don't dig cupcakes that much.

Adventures with Johnny, Part 17

Johnny says: "This Bridge to Nowhere only cost $279.00.

...of course, we didn't waste any money on t-shirts":

Adventures with Johnny, Part 16

Johnny attends the Community Service Forum held at Columbia University on Thursday.

She arrived early enough to watch John McCain go first, but kept growling, loud enough that she was asked to leave. She left, grabbed a pint of Guinness at a local bar, and came back for Obama's segment.

Later, she asked Sen. Obama to sign an autograph. Then she licked his face.

Sorry For The Foul Language...

...but this just makes me laugh.

Adventures with Johnny, Part 15

Johnny appeared with Charlie Gibson while he interviewed Governor Sarah Palin today.

After some low-level growls and an attempt to piddle on her leg, Johnny had to removed from the taping.

Sarah Palin hates Polar Bears. Johnny loves Polar Bears. So, due to the law of Transitive Properties, Johnny really, really hates Sarah Palin.

Adventures with Johnny, Part 14

Johnny and Daddy do a dramatic interpretation of the Sarah Palin/John McCain relationship.

Performance Art = Fun!

Matt Damon For The Win

Why I'm A Proud Liberal

You know, for the longest time I was always shy about calling myself a liberal, because the term had become so stigmatized. And lord knows there are a lot of people on the left who I just can't stand--it's not like Conservatives have the patent on being a-holes (although they're doing their best!)

But then I saw this clip:



...ok, yeah, pretty silly, I know. But it made me think--here's a black woman who will potentially be First Lady, dancing with the host of a massively popular talk show hosted by a lesbian--an a married one, at that.

Ask yourself, if Conservatives ran the world, would we have this? Would we even see a black woman or a lesbian on TV at all?

Nope. All TV would look like--well, me. And that's boring.

As I started writing this, I had a clear point in my mind, but somehow I've lost it. All I want to say is, I'm so tired of the world Conservatives so desperately want to have, where everyone is Christian, straight, and never says a bad word about America--and to be anything other than that is wrong and evil.

It's a bigger, better, more interesting world than that. And for all the mistakes liberals make, that's the one they want to live in and strive to create. I want to live there, too.

I just wish it would get here faster.

Film Club: Food of the Gods

It's that time again--another movie review for the Film Club, the creation of Stacie Ponder over at Final Girl!

This month's selection is Food of the Gods, an uber-cheapie production with a bit of a deceptive pedigree--its based on a story by H.G. Wells. That sound you hear is the little Englishman rolling in his grave, still, thirty or so years after the film was made.

Ok, let's get started:

...oh, MGM, you've done better!

...oh boy, we're already in trouble. Bert I. Gordon? Bert War of the Colossal Beast, Beginning of the End Gordon?

..."based on a Portion of the Novel"? Yeah, the page numbers! (Bada-bing!)

"Special Visual Effects by B.I. Gordon"? You're not fooling anybody, Bert!

Anyway, this film stars...Mac Davis from North Dallas Forty? No, it's Marjoe Gortner, whose face (in movie leading man terms) is as odd as his name.

Marjoe plays a football player who goes off hunting with some friends in the woods. While Marjoe is fine with just trapping the deer and letting it go, his dickish friend wants to kill it, and runs into the woods. While there, he encounters a weird bunch of really big bugs:

The giant bugs going a-stingin', leaving the hunter all puffy and blotchy. And, oh, dead:

Marjoe ends up investigating, for no good reason, and discovers a small farm. Inside a barn is a giant, killer chicken!!:

The farm is run by two old-timers, one of them played by Ida Lupino (oh, the sadness). Turns out they have been feeding their animals from this weird goo that's bubbles up out of the ground, which makes everything that eats from it grow big--real big. Giant killer chicken big.

But as a break from all the gripping drama, Bert I. Gordon gives lots and lots of footage of Marjoe and a friend as they travel back and forth on a ferry, featuring riveting shots like this:

...seriously--this is movie about 85 minutes, and at least a third of it is watching people board and disembark a ferry in excruciating detail.

Anyway, back at the farm, we see that farmer woman Ida Lupino is not immune to what she and her husband have been doing. You see, everything grows big and angry, even worms:

...this is a long way from High Sierra. The great Ida Lupino should not have had to share a movie screen with a giant bloody worm puppet.

At the same time, her husband is attacked by giant rats, and its in moments like these where we can see the "special" effects:

...no, no, that's not a bunch of friendly rats climbing on a toy car and Bert I. is passing it off as a special effect. I can see how you'd be confused.

Anyway, Marjoe and his friend decide to get involved and hunt down the giant animals, instead of, you know, alerting the authorities. What can the Army do that a Nose Tackle and a football team's Road Manager can't?

At the farm, they meet up with an older man and a younger woman. The man owns a pharmaceutical firm who has bought up the land and wants to market the goo, while his young charge takes an interest in Marjoe:

...is that a 12-gauge in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Meanwhile, a young couple are on vacation in the woods. The man goes outside their RV, and sees a giant rat on the roof. So what does he do? Well, he does what any of us would do when you see a giant, man-sized rat: call your pregnant wife to come out and look at it with you!

Of course, this awesome plan goes all kerflooey, and soon Mr. and Mrs. Mensa are trapped by a horde of giant rats and have to run for it:

Eventually all our characters are holed up in the cabin, in Bert I.'s tribute to Night of the Living Dead I guess.

Our heroes are only stocked with guns, so they start shooting at the rats, and its at this moment that the movie stopped being fun for me, at all:

...up until this point, the movie's special effects had been laughably lame. But what I thought at first were F/X I realized are not F/X at all--the rats in the movie were clearly being shot at, for real, by probably bee-bee guns, in a horrid attempt to make it look realistic.

Look, I'm disgusted by rats as much as the next man, but shooting a bunch of them for a God damn movie? That is absolutely disgusting and morally repellent.

I stuck it out the rest of the way, but then Bert I. moves onto drowning the rats, as well, and I got so disgusted I gave up. Torturing and murdering animals to make some shitty movie is inhuman.

You know, I've always had a soft spot in my heart for the films of Bert I. Gordon--sure, they were cheesy, but they were inoffensive fluff so what's the harm?

But after seeing this disgrace, I want Bert I. Gordon arrested. I hear Michael Vick has room in his cell.

Afternoons with Berry

Sundays are the day Johnny goes over and spends the day with her Grammy and Grandpop (her two favorite people in the world), and since Tracy is at work, that leaves just the men of the house at home.

Berry, like most cats, spends most of his day asleep in some dark corner of the house that sometimes even I can't find. But today, he decided to camp out on the bed we have sitting next to my computer desk, so we sort of spent the day together as I worked and he slept.

It was nice.

A Change Is Gonna Come

Ok, looking back over the last few days, I'm a little unhappy with how bitter and nasty the tone of my blog has become.

Not that John McCain/Sarah Palin/the Republican Party aren't deserving of such scorn, but after a while you grow restless, and want something uplifting, you know?

So, after seeing some really encouraging numbers re: Obama's efforts to recruit new Democratic voters, I decided I'm going to search out some stuff that makes me feel good about what I think is happening in my country right now.

So here's a little something I've always liked that makes me feel uplifted: my boy Bob singing a cover of Sam Cooke's immortal "A Change Is Gonna Come":



(here are the lyrics for the Dylan Impaired:)

I was born by the river in a little tent
Oh and just like the river I've been running ever since
It's been a long, a long time coming
But I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will

It's been too hard living but I'm afraid to die
Cause I don't know what's up there beyond the sky
It's been a long, a long time coming
But I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will

I go to the movie and I go downtown
Somebody keep telling me don't hang around
It's been a long, a long time coming
But I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will

Then I go to my brother
And I say brother help me please
But he winds up knocking me
Back down on my knees

Ohhhhhhhhh.....

There been times that I thought I couldn't last for long
But now I think I'm able to carry on
It's been a long, a long time coming
But I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will

Johnny and Her Uncle Mac

This is Johnny and her Uncle Mac (and, er, me). Her Uncle Mac always treated his crazy niece with patience and understanding, even when she got in his face--literally.

Mac died tonight.

He had been acting strangely the past few weeks, and then very suddenly started acting terribly sick. My parents rushed him to the emergency animal hospital, but he died on the way. As far as anyone can tell, some sort of growth burst and when that happened it was very, very sudden.

My parents adopted Mac from a rescue organization. He spent the first nine years or so of his life tied up outside in his owner's yard, left alone for the most part. Once he landed at my parents house, he got chicken for dinner every day, a Butterscotch Krimpet for his birthday, a pile of toys, and got to sleep on a big comfy bed with my Mom and Dad.

Nothing but nothing seemed to bother Mac, we would often joke that he loved his new life so much that he simply wasn't going to get upset at anything, anymore--considering where he came from, his new life was all but perfect.

As I said above, Mac put up with his crazy niece with quiet dignity--most often disappearing behind a chair once it became clear Johnny was not going to stop running around the house like a maniac. He even put up with her when she would trail around after him in the yard, just trying to find a private place to pee. Is that too much to ask?

Mac was a wonderful dog, and I'm glad he got to spend a decent chunk of his life with my parents, who treat their dogs as well as they treated their kid, which is pretty damn good.

Fun With Captions

"Hey, is that a Liberal? Let's get him!!"

They're Really Packin' Em In At the RNC

Last night, 8pm. 8pm.

What The Right REALLY Thinks About Sarah Palin

...did I just hear Peggy Noonan say "it's over"?

Bob Dylan Plays at the RNC*

(*not really)

You Bet I'm Angry!

I know that President Chimpy here meant "angry left" as an insult during his speech at tonight's RNC convention, but I wear it as a badge of honor. You bet I'm angry, Mr. President.

I'm angry you've thrown us into massive deficits. I'm angry your whole style of governing is based on pitting people against each other, finding ways they disagree, jamming an electoral crowbar in there, and making the divisions worse.

I'm angry that you've polluted our environment, angry you twiddled and cut a birthday cake with John "Did I Mention I Was a P.O.W.?" McCain while a major American city flooded and its citizens starved, I'm angry you've halted stem-cell research based on some twisted pretzel logic, prolonging people's suffering, I'm angry you've turned the Justice Department into a joke.

I'm angry you've made the rest of the world hate us, I'm angry you've started torturing people, I'm angry you let our wounded veterans live in shoddy conditions at Walter Reed, I'm angry you've shredded the Constitution in a mad grab for power. I'm angry you've plunged us into an endless war, where we've killed and maimed thousands of people, all based on a total lie.

But most of all, I'm angry that, in the end, your only punishment will be history. It won't take long before you're recognized as the worst President in a century, but anything less than you being thrown in a prison cell along with your accomplice Dick Cheney is getting off too easy.

Yeah, I'm angry, Mr. President.

Oh, It Gets Better

This is the Ultimate Vice Presidential Moment--when a terrible confluence of events occurred, and the Vice President had to step up, assume the mantle of leadership, and lead the country of a terrible moment.

And John McCain is saying Sarah Palin is ready for this?

The internets--and now the MSM--are ablaze with all the dirt, lying, and inconsistencies that are surfacing about Sarah Palin. And what's great about it is, most of it is being aimed in the right direction--at McCain. I have no idea how nice or competent a person Palin is--though I find her views abhorrent--but this whole fooferall is really about McCain; his recklessness, his desperation, his love of taking big risks.

But there are a couple of really interesting things surfacing, like Palin's membership in the the Alaskan Independence Party, a group whose main goal is to declare themselves independent. Here's a fun quote from the one of group's founders on the site's front page:

...say what you will about Obama's Reverend Nutsy Squirrel, but at least he never wanted to secede from the union.

Now, of course, I don't care a whit that Palin was a member of the group. According to stuff I've been reading, local Alaskan politics is such that you have to deal with the group, and sort of give them lip service or they cause all kinds of headaches. I don't think this is any sort of disqualifier.

But...if the press and the Republicans could get so worked up over Rev. Wright and his "God damn America" quotage, then you have to take the above into consideration. The phrase escapes me, but I believe it involves the words "goose" and "gander."

There's also Palin's wonderfully deep, abiding interest in U.S. history:

...you know, you have every right in this country to be a know-nothing ignoramus. But you don't have to be such an arrogant prick about it.

I think John McCain handed Barack Obama the greatest gift he has received since Hillary Clinton voted for the Iraq War.

Undercover Angels

Today, I received a text message from the Obama campaign asking me to donate $5 to the Red Cross to go towards Hurricane Gustav relief.

Now, that's pretty cool, but they went even further--all you had to do was text them right back, with the word "Give" in the message, and--sim sala bim!--the donation would be registered, and show up on your bill.

I have no idea how much money Obama is going to raise this way, but considering how easy they made it, and how many people the campaign has on its rolls, I bet its a lot.

See, this is another reason why I like this guy, and the organization he's put together--streamlined, effective, and inclusive. Obama is calling his people to help out, but in the easiest--yet most useful--way possible right now.

What's McCain doing? Oh, here's down in the Gulf, getting some nice photo ops, and, since a Presidential candidate requires all kinds of security, using up valuable resources that could be going to any relief efforts needed. And what, exactly, is he going to help with? Fill sandbags? Hand out bottled water?

Obama isn't looking for that splashy PR move, calling attention to himself--instead, he's out there, organizing his people to get something done.

Yes we can.